Teen, Spouse and Substances
My spouse works long hours, is physically active and in good health. He enjoys drinking and smoking weed on occasion. I do not enjoy weed and I have a health condition that is exacerbated by alcohol so I don't drink except very rarely and very moderately because otherwise, I will have painful symptoms. Because of this if my husband is having beer or wine or drinks after work he is drinking alone. Also, I grew up around a lot of stoned hippies and an alcoholic stepfather so being around stoned or drunk people when I'm not is unpleasant and frightening to me. My husband drinks a beer or two after work and I don't mind that. However, periodically he will get stoned or drink too much and I really hate it. He will also do this when he is hanging out with our teen and that just sends me through the roof. Last night, I was doing some chores in one area of our home for a few hours and when I returned they were looking at old photos on the computer. After a few minutes I could tell my husband was high by his exaggerated laughter and responses. He denied it at first but then admitted it. He was also drinking a vodka based drink. I didn't say anything at the time but I was furious. This morning I confronted him on it and reminded him that we had agreed that he would not drink or be high around our teen. He gave me a bunch of excuses and basically said that I am being unreasonable. What do you think? Is it ok to be buzzed around your teen if you're at home and it's late at night and there is another responsible adult around? I hate it but maybe I'm overreacting due to my past experiences? Thanks for your input.