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Might anyone know if there are any narcissistic emotional abuse support groups in the Diablo Valley area? Many thanks in advance!
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One of the most significant supports I've found (family, ex husband = Narcissistic Personality Disorder) is educating myself about the behavior patterns that are typical of narcissists. Because their behavior patterns are masked at first, they are hard to believe when initially surfacing. And when victims finally try to leave the family or curtain family abuse, or call them out at work the denial and the price is incredibly high. So, untangling what actually happened (lots and lots of gaslighting) and it's impact takes a long time. But,there is a lot to learn from people who have lived to tell the tale. 1. Check on a very long thread over the years on Quora-Narcissism Narcissists. Commenters are therapists, and recovered victims who have a lot of insight. Now and then there are people who are not experienced and poorly informed, but that's relatively rare. Elinor Greenburg, a therapist from the East Coast comments now and then. And there are some truly eloquent and wise commentaries that have shed light, also, importantly, increasingly eased my sense it was my fault for the troubles. If you can go back in the years, it is worth it. It's a book's worth of helpful and very personal information from people who were victims themselves and therefore who know victims need a lot of encouragement.. 2. There is a folksy but really smart and warm woman in the UK who has a website called Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers. She has a free letter that she sends that is very up to the moment, and chats about the shared experiences of those with narcissistic mothers. Moving. Liberating to read. She also offers remote counseling in the form of conversation and a massive library of really good EFT tapping scripts to purchase, The EFT scripts address all the new mental and emotional directions so hard to make habit, after anyone has been gutted by a narcissist. I found these extremely useful. They are long 5-15 minutes depending on the goal of the script. Very accurate (IMHO, as DONM myself) and on target recovery tapping scripts. Worth the money. Don't need all of them. Pick and choose and get the feel. Very helpful long term for learning to once again live with joy, purpose, self care, lessen the taught-to-self-harm that comes from narcissistic parent to some of their children. At worst, the scripts are synopses of the battles you will fight in your life...and the accomplishments you can hope to achieve. At best, they will effectively shift one away from the pain and into the light of self healing, growth and development. Frankly, as far as the EFT scripts go...I think they are going to be applicable whether the narcissist was a mother, father, husband, sibling or work colleague. More or less the same rock to crawl out from under when it comes to recovery from and reducing a narcissist's impact. Removal of implanted wounds and minimizing externally imposed mistaken self beliefs in their victims. That's my two sense. These two resources have made a big difference to me. 3. As did finding a good therapist who has recovered from their own narcissist parent.. Recovery in this area is it's own unique territory. 4.There are podcasts, as well. Lots to pick from.
I do not have any resources for you but I am also in the process of separating from my husband. I would characterize the relationship as falling into this category and I'm having a heck of time dealing with it. Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.