Restrictions on food for park birthday parties
My son had his 5th birthday party in a park near a playground and we had an issue that I'd like opinions on for the future and what others do as I know park birthday parties as very common. My son has invited his friends to the party and 3 of the boys had severe allergies. They are close friends so I accommodated these allergies and all of the food was safe for them to eat (and approved by their parents). None of these boys had a nut allergy and the moms said nut was ok so the cake and one of the other desserts had nuts in them. The food was restricted to the tables only and kids did not take food onto the play area. The boys were playing on the playground with some other kids there and when it was time of cake invited the other kids they met in the playground to join them for cake, which I was ok with (as we got enough for all kids and adults and adults never eat cake so there was plenty extra). I insisted that all of the boys ask their moms permission to join us for cake (they all looked to be 5 to 7 years old range) and asked the moms about any allergies. One of the moms said her boy was allergic to nuts so I told her that I'm sorry but our cake has nuts in it and I can serve her boy fruit but I was not looking out for nuts when I was choosing snacks for the party as I was focused on other allergies so don't know if her boy can safely have any of the other snacks. She said nuts is the main allergy out there and I should not have nuts in birthday party food as now her son is going to miss out and cannot eat the cake. She left with her boy soon after; the other boys joined the party as they received permission. I know there are a lot of allergies out there and I am always careful to accommodate the allergies of my guests as much as possible, but do people really accommodate all allergies even if none of their guests have it. I understand that her son was disappointed not to have cake and I talked to my son about not inviting kids he does not know to join us for cake/food until I ask their mommy if it is ok since if the mom says no they will be sad, but beyond that not sure if there is an unspoken rule I don't know about.