Inheritance issue: my mother-in-law has not set up a trust
Hi - I am a widow, and my husband's mother is in her late 80's. She told me several years ago she wanted to leave money to all the grandkids after she passed away. At the time, she told me the stipulations for my kids (all the grandkids?) would be that the money could only be used for educational purposes, and the kids had to be drug and alcohol free. I found out recently she hasn't finalized setting up this trust. I guess I wanted to consult a lawyer about what would my kids possibly be entitled to if she passes away without setting up a trust. Also if she does set up a trust with these conditions, are there any legal issues we should be aware of? My husband's family is very secretive about money in general, and I'm considered an outsider because I'm the in-law, so asking them for more information directly won't work. Even asking them for a copy of a finalized trust would be considered invasive. Thanks.
Parent Replies
Not a lawyer, but if your MIL has living children and dies without a will or trust, her estate would eventually (after probate) pass to them. Your children are entitled to nothing. I don't really see a solution for you that doesn't involve asking her directly if she plans to establish a trust, who would be the trustees, who would be the beneficiaries, etc. Honestly why not just assume there is not going to be an inheritance? If she had sincerely intended to help grandkids with education, she would have set up 529s.
My mom had a trust and told me what it said, but for me not to tell anyone else. But after that (having been diagnosed with early stage Alzheimers), she changed her trust, and now I have no idea what she's doing with her estate. I am just going to have to wait until she either tells me or else passes away. If your husband's mother actually does have a trust, I think you are in a similar situation to me. I don't think consulting a lawyer is going to help either of us (but you can talk with a lawyer of course).
If she passes away without a will or trust, intestate succession laws will dictate who inherits (a lawyer would not be able to tell you anything different, or do anything about your children; she has to do that before she passes):
Here's a quick overview:
If you die with:
here's what happens:
Yes. You need to consult a lawyer. You should not rely on any advice you might get here -- except for recommendations for a lawyer. The response from ECMom2, for example, is not entirely correct. Your MIL may have a will, even if she has not set up a trust. If she has neither a will nor a trust, the laws of intestate succession will control. No one should offer an opinion on how those laws might apply here, since none of us knows who the potential heirs are. Get thee to a lawyer. Please.
I totally disagree with the comment sending you to a lawyer. You will just have to wait this out. Your kids are not 'entitled' to anything and since you won't//can't ask, there is no way you will know until it happens. The truth sucks. When my grandfather died he left EVERYTHING to ONE of my siblings, and there were 7 grandkids. My father dis-inherited 2 kids at the last minute. You never know what will happen and you can't control it. If they get something, that's great, and if not you need to let it go and move on. Money makes people crazy, especially in death.
Drug and alcohol free? That’s rather extreme. What college student is alcohol-free? How could you even prove that?
I suggest that you offer to help her to set up 529 plans for all the grandkids. This would be easier than setting up a trust, although she couldn’t stipulate anything about drugs and alcohol which she can’t control anyway. In addition, she could front-load it, so she could fund it and forget about it for five years
people don’t like to talk about money or death. So this will be difficult. Good luck!!