Kid doing graffiti with new boyfriend
My husband and I have an 18 year old who has been toying with edgier boys than her very clean-cut boyfriend of a couple years, whom she broke up with recently. She does continue to tell me things, and I think we do enjoy open and honest communication. Recently, she casually told me, framing it as "no big deal" that her new boyfriend engages in graffiti, and that she is experimenting with creating her own tag. I started by telling her that defacement of public property is illegal, dangerous and disrespectful of her city, which she loves. She shut me down, but we continued to discuss it with her until she agreed not to do it, or go along while it's being done. This boy wants to come over late, making me suspicious that he might take her out "tagging." I already caught him once in the house in the middle of the night. The boy in question is unemployed and not in school. I'm having trouble getting them to hew to some basic rules about how often he can come over, and my husband and I are both afraid to confront him directly, though my daughter has made him aware that there are rules. The question is, should we confront him about the graffiti (my daughter will likely bolt and can't support herself yet) and isn't it reasonable to set a limit on his time spent in my home?