Bat Mitzvah for non-observant, non-religious family
I was raised in a conservative but not particularly observant Jewish household. We three kids attended a nascent progressive, kind of out there, parent-led, small Jewish day school. We all had bar and bat mitzvahs and went to temple on the "high holidays" and a few other holidays and Shabbats sprinkled throughout the year. Fast forward, and all three of us kids are in our 40's and not at all connected to Judaism, or religiously affiliated at all. However, my parents are still deeply attached to their identity as Jews, more in a cultural way than a religious one, if that makes sense to some of you. I know that it makes them sad that none of their grandchildren are being raised "Jewish", though of course they are "Jew-ish." We have recently begun to explore Judaism with our kids a bit ~ we did Hanukkah with my parents this year, and we've taken them to some celebrations at the Jewish Museum. My parents have attended some of their friends' grandchildren's bar and bat mitzvahs recently, and I know they must feel a bit sad to know that they won't be attending any of their own. So...I am thinking (very tentatively) about what it might take to have a bat mitzvah for our children. How much do you have to "buy in" to the whole religion thing to do so? I remember a lot of practicing and classes etc., which does not at all appeal to me (and wouldn't to our daughter), but this was three decades ago and in a different region of the country, so perhaps things are different here/now. Are there others out there who have bat mitzvahed their kids out of deference to their parents, in a way that can still ring true to a family that has little belief in "god" and even less in organized religion? If so, what tools and resources in our community have you drawn from? Has it been costly (we are on a very modest budget). I have such deep gratitude and love for my parents that I would really love to do this for them, as I know it would bring them tremendous joy and pride. But perhaps it is too fraught and involved a road to go down without a firm commitment to Judaism from our family? Thank you.