Baby on the way -- managing friends who don't vaccinate
We are expecting our second baby later this summer. We have followed the recommended vaccine schedule w/our son and are planning to do the same for new baby -- however, over the last couple weeks, we've learned that the 2 neighbor families we have playdates with most often are both unvaccinated. Since the new baby won't get an MMR vaccine until they're a year old, and measles has been popping up all over the Bay in the last 6 months or so, we're wondering if that means we ought to keep baby away from those kids for the first year. We're comfortable w/Big Brother continuing to play with them since he's up to date on shots, but just b/c of how family/childcare dynamics are likely to work out, in practice this would mean considerably less time w/these friends for him as well.
I'm explicitly not looking to start a debate about the pros and cons of vaccinating -- my spouse and I have our opinion, others have theirs. But we are at a bit of a loss with how to manage this mess.
It seems like our choices are: 1) bring baby along to playdates and keep our fingers crossed, the same way we'll be doing at the park, grocery store, and other public places. 2) limit contact w/these families to times when Big Brother can go and baby can stay behind. Big Brother is still a little young for dropoff playdates (will have just turned 3 when baby arrives), and I'd also feel awkward being basically unable to reciprocate. Finally, I'd be worried about how to explain the change in routine to Big Brother (this would be a major reduction in time spent together, from 2-3 times a week to maybe once every couple weeks) especially in a way that wouldn't prompt resentment of baby for it being 'their fault.'
Planning to ask the pediatrician at our next well-child visit and get her thoughts, but since I'm sure we're not the first family to encounter this conflict, I wondered if anyone out there had any words of wisdom for making things easier.