Anxiety about puberty

Our 10 year old daughter is tall and physically mature. She's showing all signs that indicate that she will have her first period pretty soon. She's feeling very anxious about getting her period. We put together a period bag together, which stays in her backpack, and went over what to do in the bathroom. We've read puberty books. She is definitely showing signs of regression -- baby talks, pretending to be a baby, wanting to co-sleep, clutching to her loveys. Every night she has a hard time falling asleep due to anxiety and worries and says that she wants to stay a kid forever. She doesn't want to be a teenager. She doesn't want to be an adult. She likes being a kid. She doesn't even like being 10 years old. She wants to go back to being 9.

Honestly, we don't want her to grow up so fast either. But, this train comes when it comes and we all need to work together to embrace it. Any tips on how to support a child who is anxious about and not wanting to go through puberty? Thank you. 

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RE: Anxiety about puberty ()

I recommend a book called "Celebrate Your Body (and its changes too!)" by Sonya Renee Taylor. I gave it to my daughter and she has really enjoyed it. I would encourage you to read it with her and "marvel" with curiosity and incredulity at the human body - at least those techniques helped me and my daughter. We have an extra copy, you're welcome to it. 

RE: Anxiety about puberty ()

Hi - your post reminded me of my SON - believe it or not.  My son did not want to grow up and suffered anxiety at night.  At 22, they still have a young nature and playful spirit.  Post-puberty, they recently revealed that they are trans.  It breaks my heart that we were not able to help them at a younger age -- it is still very early days as we navigate options.  However, hormone blockers would have been welcome. As a woman, she'll face a tough time since she is tall for a man -- much more so as a woman.  I encourage you to find a therapist that your daughter can talk to.  Even if her issues are not gender-related, she needs support.

RE: Anxiety about puberty ()

This sounds like my daughter!  She is 14 now and doing ok,, but has resisted many aspects of maturing.  Everything is pronounced at this age- likes and dislikes.  It’s an odd time for everyone!  Some kids are “late bloomers” for a reason- and I’m not talking physically- but mainly emotionally.   My kid has never been in a hurry to grow up- unlike me I wanted everything to happen faster.  Just like other states of developing this one will happen whether she likes it or not- but let her go slow.  Let her be a baby in a way.  Your kid will remember how you let her be nostalgic about her best memories- respecting her journey of development is the best gift you can give her to stabilize your bond into the next phase of her life.  She’ll let you know when she needs more space.  & don’t have too many older kid conversations- some kids don’t listen anyways- listen to her cues.